Feeling blessed in spite of my circumstances

For as long as I can remember ,I have put myself last . I was a daughter  then a wife and then a mother and onto being a grandmother ( a young grandmother I might add) .I thought that my kids and the people that I have honored and respected would always be there when I needed them , but life gives us unexpected twists and turns and rips the heart right out of us. I have learned on this journey that God wants us to depend on Him and let go of pain and heartbreak .What this meant for me was giving up the people that I loved the most and learning to let go and let God take control . I feel like I am a completely different person and having to start over and live for God more and He will bring in the right people and remove the wrong ones.I hand tried to let go of the anger, the hurt, the frustration that caused me to fall like a lost soul into a deep depression that I have struggled to fight my way back from. I am seeing light at the end of the tunnel. I am trying to feel again . I am learning to trust God more and people less. I’m alive and hopeful .I am worth  more than I have ever given myself credit for but I was looking for validation from family and that was my biggest mistake. God is all the validation that I need .My life will come back together and this time I will be more joyful, loved, and treated with the respect that I deserve.

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